Christmas and I am bitchy.

The day has arrived. My parents, my brother and his wife, and my nephew and his girlfriend are all coming over at 3ish for the taste bonanza. I am making my shrimp thing that has sauted tomatoes, onions, garlic, red pepper flakes and giant shrimp. Eaten with crusty bread it is a serious flavor buzz. I am also making cheese fondue and assorted dips. I am also having mousse truffle pate. Everyone is bringing their favorite food buzz. Or is supposed to be. My brother informed me yesterday he is making curry......antelope curry. Although it sounds like spiced gristle, it will probably be delicious-he is a very good cook. Which is fortunate since his wife prides herself on the fact that she doesn't cook. This is tatamount to saying "I don't read" as far as I can see. You read the directions, and follow them. Big whoop.

I woke up this morning to 6 inches of snow and it is still coming down. It is a blizzard and the weathermen will probably name it. My nephew called me and informed me that he is bringing a tomato salad. And that is it. A caprese salad, wow, genius. He also told me that he didn't get home until 5 am (he is a bartender) and made $700 last night. Could he not put that towards a better dish? There is only 10 years difference in our ages and since his mother, my sister, passed away 4 years ago, I am his chief nagger.

I had the wild urge to sing Carols this year and that means going to a church. I was raised Episcopal, baptised and confirmed and have taken communion about twice since then. I have my own religion of just try and be a good person. I just can't get behind the Jesus thing. I believe he existed as a person but the rest just doesn't work for me, hence my getting kicked out of Sunday school 8 times for arguing with my teachers. "Ok, I get the Father and the Son but who is the Holy Ghost?" "Where do the dinosaurs come in?" I was prepard to enter the solemn cathedral of Saint John's and suck it up just to belt out some songs. I love the atmosphere and it kind of makes me cry. But as soon as the priest starts talking, I tune out. Luckily, a friend phoned last night and said she is singing with a choir this year and that they were singing at 6:30 pm for 1 hour at The Church Of Scientific Thought. She said it is a mix of all religions and there is no dogma, you can pray to the light if you want. Sounded good. The first speaker gave me the indication that this church was actually The Church of Women Who Used to be Men. I think I went to a transvestitie church. It was excellent people watching. They turned out all the lights and we lit candles and all held them up and they lit the church. And then we sang. It was cool and I was home by 8:00.

They spoke about how whatever God is, it is within you. I couldn't stop thinking: This little light of mine, I'm gonna let it shine. So I called my other sister , that I rarely speak with for a million reasons, and wished her Merry Christmas and that I wished she were here with us. I am going to be Buddhist ish no matter how hard it is, Forgiveness, forgiveness, forgiveness.

Now it itime for Harry Belafonte, Vince Gauraldi, and Billie Holiday. Merry Merry.

Frenzy

It is the Friday before Xmas and the city is FLIPPING out. I just drove past the local mall, Cherry Creek, and there was a line of cars 8 BLOCKS LONG!!!! This is just to enter into the area around the Whole Foods and little boutiques. The day started at a balmy 45 degrees and has dropped down to the 20's and it is snowing....Hard. I am going out at 10 pm to do the grocery shopping because I can't climb into the belly of the beast. I am buying it all tonight and then I am finished. Almost.

My insomnia knows no bounds and I was up until 4:30 last night. I went back to the free bootlleg movie site and watched Lions for Lambs. Tom Cruise just weirds me out. And then I found it.....my childhood revisited......Bugsy Malone. The entire thing Online. And to think the guy who directed it also directed Midnight Express. Scott Baio peaked at 13. The Chachi thing was mortifying and age has not improved his personality. In the early 90's , when I was starting out in film production, I worked on "The Happy Days Reunion" . Henry Winkler= sweet as pie, Scott Baio= mean little macho freak. The Executive Producer was a drug addict and completely insane and our office was over The Cat and the Fiddle on Sunset Blvd. Memories.......I am all over the place due to my lack of sleep so I will cut myself off.

Xmas stress

It happens every year. I have the greatest of intentions when it comes to Xmas and as soon as I see the cheesy decorations up in the stores....the paralysis sets in. All good ideas for presents evacuate and I am left with gift card purchasing. I used to Craft out, and I am not talking about crocheted chatchkes but groovy things like spices I brought back from India and packaged in hip little containers and embroidered things. I can barely summon up the energy to open cards let alone send them out. It is getting worse every year and I am sure there is some deep psychological reason for it but I don't feel like soul-mining presently so I am just avoiding it all. I have turned down 3 party invitations. A couple nice meals with the family and I am ready to move on to 2008.

The small amount of soul mining I have done has given me a little insomnia lately and I have ended up on some strange web sites in the middle of the night. Did you know that the Dalai Lama has a My Space page? And it's really good. And I also ended up on a "FREE" movie site. They had "No Country For Old Men" and it was free. HOWEVER, it was a copy of the film that was taped by some guy who went to an early screening and snuck in a video camera. The screen goes dark a couple times and he actually says "Down in front". You can hear people eating popcorn and taking off their jackets. It's pretty funny. I watched part of "The Secret" in Hebrew with English subtitles. Here's a secret: it may be a life philosophy but it is a bad movie.

So in further avoidance of all things Holiday, and indulging one of my favorite things to do, I went to a matinee today. Elizabeth, the Golden Age. The heater was broken and it was like watching it in someone's garage. To get even with the Heat Miser, I stuck around and slipped into another movie, "The Kingdom". It was escapism, if nothing else. Except that there was something else. There were only about 4 of us in the entire theater and the guy sitting 4 seats away was getting twitchy. He started speaking out loud and was mildly annoying. The movie is about Saudi Arabia and murder. This guy clearly had some issues with the Muslim world or the Armed Forces or something. He got more and more agitated and then gave me a looooooooooooong stare that scared the Hell out of me. I would have left but he was blocking my aisle and I was afraid he would stab me or something. Never sneak into the second movie, this was my lesson. Even though I almost got shivved in a bad movie, it was better than going to Mall at Christmas.